This witless send-up of teen movies and action flicks plays like something you'd find on the Disney Channel on Saturday morning -- except, of course, for the lesbian romance. Be assured, though, that Angela Robinson's studio debut is about as subversive as a pink polo shirt. Expanded from her 2003 short film of the same name, the wispy plot centers on a government agency that uses the S.A.T. to identify and recruit girls with an aptitude for lying, cheating, and ruthless mayhem. Unfortunately, and incomprehensibly, the movie does nothing with the amusing premise of prima donnas dabbling in the spy game. Things get even less interesting, somehow, when one of the D.E.B.S. (Sara Foster) falls for glamorous arch-villain Lucy Diamond (Jordana Brewster). Their secret, simpering love affair gives new meaning to "lipstick lesbian," with any hints of sexual politics rendered harmless by the pastel sets and pop soundtrack. It's hard to figure the audience for this tripe, but easy to see why Robinson was hired to direct Disney's Lindsay Lohan summer flick Herbie: Fully Loaded.