by David Downs
Monty Python in their most darkly sarcastic moment couldn't have conjured up something as cuttingly comedic as the national “bath salts scare”, which is fast spinning out of control this week. “Following bans in Florida, Louisiana and North Dakota, and a warning from White House Drug czar Gil Kerlikowske, New York Sen. Charles Schumer has proposed a bill that would add bath salts to a list of federally controlled substances,” ABC reports today. Put it right up there with marijuana.
Schumer wants to ban bath salts - “a range of water-soluble, usually inorganic solid products designed to be added to a bath” - on the off chance that a kid might try to smoke them, which can cause “hallucinations, paranoia, suicidal thoughts and death”.
Legalization Nation has just learned that smoking a wide variety of products available at Bed Bath & Beyond can get a person high, not just bath salts. And let's not even get into the kitchen or garage, where nutmeg and paint has a long tradition of messing up fourth graders.
The pending ban brings us again to the humor at the totalitarian core of prohibition: anything that can be misused is subject to a ban to ensure public health and safety. We simply cannot trust parents or grandparents with the freedom to take baths. There is simply too much at stake.
Can someone please re-start the banana peel scare again next?
Addendum: LN is aware of a wide variety of noxious lab chemicals sold as Spice, Bath Salts, Incense, etc. Bans cost money, create crimes, and don't stop drug use.