Fuck Flash, Java, and Shockwave! Berkeley band Thee More Shallows' official site reminds us of the webpages that every nerdy pre-teen was making back when the concept of "homepage" was just developing via GeoCities and its ilk, what, like ten years ago? We don't care if it's irony, laziness, or unbridled creativity; we just like the pink background and the picture of a buff Jesus mangling his cross. If you actually want to learn something about the band, you're better off checking out its MySpace page. Or cut to the chase and download "Pulcritude," from Thee More Shallows' first record, 2002's A History of Sport Fishing.